When couples get married, one of the most important things to take care of whilst they live as a family together is the finances. Allah has granted the responsibility of the finances to the husband saying that “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because God has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. (4:34)
This ayat does not only mean that the man is to support his wife lovingly, caringly and emotionally but also lays down the need for him to provide for her financially. However, inspite of the clear guideline in the Quran set by Allah, money is the most common form of contention between couples. A majority of fights take place between the husband and the wife on the topic of finances which result is serious marital conflicts and can end up in the much disliked by Allah, divorce. That is why it is recommended that before marriage, the issues of finance are settled.
However, for those who leave this till after marriage there is a way to avoid conflicts in this issue. Couples, in the beginning of their marriages should sit down and make a financial plan and budget, laying down all their expenses and then stick to the plan for the duration of time it is made for.
The Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) has thoroughly discouraged stinginess from the husband to provide for his wife and family. It is reported that once hind, who was the wife of Abu Sufyan, came to the Prophet (PBUH) and told him that her husband does not provide sufficient fund for herself and her children so she is forced to take his money without his knowledge. To this Prophet (PBUH) said “Take what is reasonably sufficient for you and your children.” This shows the importance that Islam gives to the wife’s rights towards the earnings of the husband. If only we but knew!
So it is clear that the main responsibility of the household finances is upon the man who shares with his wife the money for his home and his children’s welfare. Allah has said in the Quran: “Let the wealthy man spend according to his means; and let the man whose provisions are restricted spend according to what Allah has given him. Allah does not burden a soul beyond what He has given it, and Allah will grant ease after a hardship. ” (65:7). Note that even in this ayat Allah talks about the “Man” who is to spend according to his means.
This brings us to the earnings of the woman. In Islam, the earnings of the wife are meant to be her own. In no way is she responsible to provide financially for her husband, her children and her home unless she herself volunteers and is willing to do so. Hence the money that the wife earns is in no circumstance, considered family income. The husband should understand this and make sure he does not make it a point of contention in their marriage in future years. As long as both the husband and the wife realize their financial responsibilities towards their spouses and their families, there shall not be any conflicts in their marital life. Money is a very sensitive issue and we must all turn to the Quran for proper guidance regarding it. Indeed Allah is All-Knowing.
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