There is a very famous tradition of the Holy Prophet (PBUH) that says “Love for your brother what you love for yourself”. Even though this tradition talks about the relationship between siblings, it is not to say that it could not also be used for partners in marriage. Couples connected through the sacredness of marriage are asked by Allah to “live with each other in kindness” and that he has ordained “love and mercy” between them. Notice that both these ayahs talk about kindness, love and compassion from both, the husband and the wife. It is not a one way street. So it is understood that Allah has asked both the partners to indeed love for their spouses what they love for themselves.
This theory makes complete sense. For if the couple lives with each other in love, they are bound to give each other the same happiness that they themselves want, the similar emotional support that they feel they themselves deserve and thereafter the same understanding towards their spouse that they would expect from them. Doing so makes the love stronger over the years as both husband and wife automatically want the same success for their partners that they would want for themselves, pray to Allah in the same way that they would pray for themselves and live with each other in patience and forgiveness as they would want for themselves.
Surely this would be the recipe for a successful Muslim marital union.
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