“… and Asad and Sara got married and lived happily ever after”. The End.
Since childhood we are led to believe through numerous story books and those chick-flicks that we see growing up that (a) the story ends when the boy and girl get married and (b) when the boy and girl get married, the story ends. And we’ve accepted this school of thought because that is how it works. There is a beginning where everything is good, then there is a plot where everything goes wrong and there is a conclusion where everything gets fantastic again and there it is, your happily ever after ending! What more do we want right?
That is where our mistake lies; the expectations built systematically in us by novels and movies that lead us to believe that once we get married, we’ll be happy and that will be the end.
Allah ordains marriage in Islam as completely different. It is certainly not the end. It is the beginning. It is the beginning of a beautiful relationship of love, trust, respect and commitment, a relationship that that immensely pleases Allah as mentioned in the Quran, “And of His signs is this: He created for you spouses from yourselves that ye might find rest in them, and He ordained between you love and mercy. Lo! herein indeed are portents for folk who reflect.”[30:21]
But do we really reflect as asked by Allah? Have we ever stopped to think why Allah made a relationship as marriage so pure and sacred as this? It is indeed because Allah wants us to attain our “happily ever after” in the true sense. And that could only mean one thing. Paradise. How would we get paradise? By completing our faith, our religion.
The Prophet (PBUH) says “When a man marries, he has fulfilled half of his religion. So let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half.” This does not mean that the Muslim attains half their faith simply by carrying out the rites of marriage. It means that they enters into the sacredness of matrimony with the intent of loving, nurturing, understanding, respecting and trusting their life partners based on the principles of Islam. It means accepting their goodness as well as their bad points, “A believing man would never feel repulsed by his believing wife; if finds something about her that he dislikes, he will always find something else about her that satisfies him.” It also means accepting that neither you, nor your partner is perfect. It means accepting your partner’s individuality rather than changing them. It means watching the sunshine hand-in-hand but it also means enduring the rain together. And finally it means having undying belief in Allah, patience and the will to compromise.
For when you and your partner live sacredly in the institution of marriage accordingly to the will of Allah, that is when the two of you step into paradise together, holding hands. Indeed the Hereafter is the “Happily Ever After” you’re looking for.
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