Indeed the relationship between the husband and the wife in marriages in Islam is that of mutual trust, affection, love and harmony. Allah has ordained to couple to live together with all this and His own remembrance, worshipping to him as a couple, believing in Him and praying to Him. the reason that allah has placed such great importance to the relationship between a husband and the wife and said again and again to seek to enter paradise together is because when the husband and wife do not have love and trust in their relationship and do not worship Allah together with diligence, shaitaan (devil) creeps into their lives.
So what form does this shaitaan take in the lives of the Muslim couple, is a question we should ask ourselves. The answer is very straight forward. The shaitaan enters the minds and souls of the couple as the very unpleasant of all feelings, suspicion!
The foundation of suspicion between the husband and wife, hence is the lack of remembrance of Allah. There is a tradition of the Holy Prophet (PBUH) “Shaitaan besieges the individual’s heart. But he retreats whenever such victims of him remember Allah. He again creeps back into the heart whenever the remembrance of Allah goes out”.
And Suspicion hits when the remembrance of Allah goes out. So beautiful is this tradition and so simply explains the entire essence of the relationship between a Muslim husband and wife. Thus when suspicion creeps into marriage it destroys it, eats away the marriage like a disease of which there is no cure.
Allah has asked us in the Quran to fight this disease of suspicion. Again and again He has mentioned in the Quran the rights of the husband and wife on each other, calling them garments of each other. Allah has truly intended the relationship of marriage to be based on TRUST, and has asked us to shun doubts, mistrusts and accusations wholeheartedly.
Allah has said in the Quran:
‘O ye who believe, avoid (indulging in) much suspicion; truly some suspicions are a sin. (49:12)’
So the question is how to avoid suspicions an save yourself from sins. Like all good marriages that are based on communication, Allah has asked us to do the same. We should be a friend of our spouse, respect them, love them and WANT to tell them everything that happens in our lives when the other is away. We should seek the remembrance of Allah and pray for a better dunya and akhirah with our spouse and to shun all evil in whatever form, that comes to our doorstep. Shaitaan in marriages could take any form. They could be the nasty Mother-in-law who complains to her son that his wife was talking secretly on the phone, or it could be the ridiculous aunt who instigates the wife against her mother-in-law. So shun them.
The holy Prophet said: “If you have a suspicion do not pursue it. (al-Tabarani)” and there is another tradition of the Holy Prophet (PBUH) that says “O Allah’s slaves, be brothers, beware of suspicion, do not look for other’s faults, do not spy, do not hate each other, do not cut off your relations with one another. (Sahih Bukhari).” Hence the Holy Prophet has asked us to stay away from all forms of evils. In marriages that is only possible by having complete faith, love and trust in the other spouse and that is only possible by the remembrance of Allah, for the more zikr you do of Allah and his Prophet (PBUH) the further away the shaitaan goes away from you, and so does the disease of suspicion.
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